Why does it hurt so much to untie the last bond?

Today, after almost 4 years my partner Dunnagh and I have split up. We have been clinging to each other so desperately that we did not see or maybe did not want to see that we can never be again what we once were.
We had not been able to rp together for over 2 years due to our different time zones (He is in the US, I am in europe) and a change of schedules in out rl mainly. Maybe we should have made a clean cut back then  but neither of us was able to let go.
This comes just at a time when i finally found back to role-play, the reopening of my beloved Dark Den/PRG has filled Gera with new energy. She is reborn and, yes she is now the character again that Dunnagh met 4 years ago. And she thrives, re-atablishes old bonds (YT!!) and ties new ones...
I can't express this feeling, to finally face that you lose someone who has gotten so deep into your soul. And its this final gesture, this "Nevermore", that feels like a small death.

I just had to write this down. Because, Dunnagh...you will stay with me forever.